Attending a Jewish Wedding: Proper Etiquette
A Conservative Perspective by Rivka C. Berman

 • Dress Code
 • Modesty of Appearance
 • Gifts for a Jewish Bride and Groom
 • Jewish Wedding Gift Ideas

Dress Code
In the United States, a great percentage of the weddings are a formal affair. Women don on their elegant getups and men suit up. Some invitations call for “black tie” attire, which means the same as it does in the general population. Tuxedos, evening gowns, etc.

Modesty of Appearance
When the Invitation Reads: Guests are Requested to Dress Modestly

Depending on the level of observance of Jewish tradition, modest dress means a dress that is not low cut at the neck or back, whose hem falls to the knee or below and dresses or tops with sleeves. Skin within these boundaries should not be visible, covering them with sheer fabric may not enough.  Ask your host if you’re not sure. No one will mind, and it’s better to ask than to feel like you have to hide your legs below the tablecloth.

Gifts for a Jewish Bride and Groom
The tradition of giving wedding gifts not only helps a couple set up their new home, but enables guests to partake in the joy of the beginning of a new life of togetherness.

Gifts of money are very common at Jewish weddings. So how much should one give? It depends on the family relation and closeness, and of course on how much one can afford. Multiples of the number 18 (equivalent to "CHAI" - Life ) is a nice touch. Rather than $100, you'll find gifts of $108 (six times CHAI), and rather than $250, check gifts will read $252 (fourteen times CHAI)

If you choose to buy a gift, you might want to ask the couple if they have registered with one of the gift services (a very common online practice, nowadays). If you choose to purchase a gift, try and deliver it before or after the wedding - to the couple's home. If you bring a boxed gift to the wedding, look for the waiter, a maid of honor, or one of the bride and groom's friends will was assigned to care for and store presents in a safe place.

Jewish Wedding Gift Ideas
 • Money (always comes in handy)
 • Contribute to the gift registry list chosen by the couple
 • A Mezuzah for the door (parchment and box)
 • Shabbat Candle sticks
 • A picture or sculpture with a Jewish theme
 • A set of Jewish/Kosher Cookbooks
 • Check out Jewish Celebrations WEDDING GIFTS

If you decide to gift the couple with anything other than money or registry participation, it is recommended that you ask the couple what they would like to receive. You will thus be sure to buy an item that would be of use and appreciated. Inclusion of an exchange certificate is always a good idea.